Thursday, November 19, 2015

Dolly Dearest - 1991

All things considered, Denise Crosby might just be the second most successful Star Trek TNG actor.  Of course no matter what Patrick Stewart "wins" hands down, but most of them went on to relatively unknown careers.  It's not like TNG was the last thing any of them ever did, but type-casting and lack of major followings did most of them in.  Denise Crosby was in a slew of 80's movies from Pink Panther to Pet Semetary, she got a little obscure in the 90's, but now has successfully graduated into being in some major TV shows (small parts, mind you) but I just keep seeing her name pop up in shit from X-Files to Dexter to Walking Dead.

Comparatively, the other stars of TNG have had careers, and I'm not like worried about them or anything, but it just seems like unless you were to search them out, you wouldn't see them just by watching TV.  In all honesty, in my mind's list of successful TNG actors, the next would be Michelle Forbes.  This movie also has another TNG actor in it, one episode only, but I have to think that came up on the set:  Chris Demetral who was Jean-Luc Riker / Ethan in the episode Future Imperfect.  I guess Wil Wheaton has had some major success as well.  But I'm over the TNG actor discussion now.

I love how movies like this come out and don't even pretend they're original.  The doll coming to life thing has been done to death, it's not like this is only a rip off of Chucky.  Sure, Child's Play had come out a few years before and this was doubtless capitalizing off tat, but the doll idea dates back way before that to Twilight Zone and other sources.  So originality is not in question here.  Sorta like in Pinocchio's Revenge, this movie has that same "is it the doll or is it the little girl?" thing going on here, except it doesn't walk the line in the death scenes as we clearly see the doll doing the killing.  The only *slight* change this time 'round is that the doll is like, somehow influencing the little girl or whatever.  Oh and there's multiple dolls that are all alive and evil, although that's not as cool as it might sound.

Dolly Dearest plays out a whole lot like you'd expect for the most part, girl Jessica gets doll, doll kills a few people, Jessica seems to be conspiring with the doll.  Mom and dad are oblivious whilst Jessica's older brother Jimmy slowly catches on and then is targeted by the doll.  One of the reviews on Wikipedia (again, wtf the plot synopsis is like 7 huge paragraphs!) that I read said this film is "in the 'killer doll' subgenre of stupid horror flicks, Dolly Dearest may very well be the most moronic."  Pretty much, bro.  Me and that writer should get a beer together, or DP a drunk college girl together, or something.

The point is, if you just want a dumb doll movie with passable effects and a overdone plot line, look no further.  It's fun in that "I want to turn it off, but the remote is all the way over there..." way, and I greatly recommend drinking a few old fashioned's to help you hobble through this one.  It would make a decent midnight movie, one you and some friends could rip on, but absence of anything really hardcore happening in the film is a turn off.  It's rated R, but the violence is pretty tame really and there's no nudity and hardly any swearing.  I think it might actually be PG-13 if it came out now.  Just litter it with topless girls (hell yeah I want Denise Crosby topless) and more blood and guts, and this movie would be much better.

The actors are good, the doll is ok, and the rest is mostly phoned in, but it can still get the middle of the road rating.



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